i did a bad thing

Nick

Born on a dragon-farm in the heart of the fens, Nick longed for nothing more than to be recognised as the greatest artist the world has ever seen. Having no discernable talent himself, he left the farm in search of an artifact which could bestow the talent upon him.

While detained at the pleasure of the King of Siam, Nick heard rumour of a magic paint brush – the Chiaruscuro. Said to give the owner unprecedented powers of brushmanship and taste, Nick decided it would be his.

He spent years searching the world, from the depths of its oceans to its highest peaks for the Chiaruscuro. Eventually he found it in a vault beneath the city of Sogut at the heart of the Ottoman Empire. After fighting through the horde of guards he opened the final door with keys of bronze, silver, and gold; and finally achieved his goal.

The brush now obeys his every command painting works of such incandescent beauty the like of which he could never achieve himself.

nick at ididabadthing dot com

Stoo

Stoo recently escaped from an asylum for the criminally insane in the darkest slums of Norwich. His cell was discovered at the bottom of a bricked over and long abandoned stair well. Etched by finger nail into the walls of his cell were the scripts for this comical series, each one cruder and more sycophantic than the last.

After his escape no record of his admission to the asylum could be found, nor any record of his life prior to his admission. Inmates and staff believe he had been trapped there, growing steadily beyond mere insanity, since the asylum was built in 1806.

Since his escape there have been many sightings of Stoo across the globe. So many in fact, that rumour has it he has created a clone army intent on conquering the world. He is considered dangerous and should not be approached by members of the public.

stoo at ididabadthing dot com
Stoo Random Quote Generator